Sunday, January 16, 2011

The Boy's Room

Cleaning out the house consists mostly of going through the stuff I've collected over the years and dealing with MY issues regarding that stuff - some are more deeply ingrained than others.  But like all parents, my habits have been learned by my child.  And yesterday it was my turn to face that. 

The following pictures are not easy to look at (I say tongue in cheek, because it's just a messy room).  It is a little embarrassing, actually, that his room got THAT messy:


Should I get into the fact that I HATE plastic and think that our children are inundated with so much crap that they really don't know how to appreciate it??  I might get into that ... but not here today.

Today I want to mention that I spent 6 hours in Daniel's room cleaning it.  I didn't remove many of the books or toys, but I did get rid of a lot of garbage.  And Daniel didn't even dive into the garbage bag to save it.  He seemed relieved.  Loved the fact that his room was clean and immediately wanted to play with his Dad in his room.  As I write, he is upstairs in bed playing on his GameBoy.




Maybe, if I get rid of more of my stuff - and deal with my issues - he'll have a better chance of not being on an episode of "Hoarders" when he gets older.

Now, why do I keep things?  Good question - and let me preface it by saying that I know I'm not abnormal (and apologizing if I'm repeating myself, which I do more of nowadays).  I don't have any more crap than the average person.  It's just that I've gotten to the point where it's bogging me down and I don't want to be there any more.  So, why have I kept things?  Well, there are different reasons.  I think I felt that if I didn't keep my grandmother's stuff, I wasn't showing my love for her.  My emotions were tied up in stuff.  Somewhere, somehow, I realized that this wasn't the case.  I don't have to keep all of my grandmother's stuff to show my love for her.  I love her, she knows this (wherever her soul may be) and I can move on.  Stuff is stuff.  It's not love.  And she won't be upset with me for not keeping it all, because once you are no longer of this material world, the material stuff doesn't matter any more.


The other reason I hang onto things (books, in particular, but also other stuff) is because I might NEED it someday.  I might want to reference that book again, or read it again.  And the truth of the matter is that I rarely re-read that book.  And the ones I do want to re-read, have usually disappeared (now where DID that copy of "Eat, Pray, Love" end up?)


I hang on to other stuff, too - I have a box full of candle holders.  And I never use them.  I have very few pairs of shoes, but several of them I haven't worn in more than 5 years.  So why do I keep them?  Because I think that maybe I'll wear them sometime - maybe I'll have an outfit that needs something other than Birkenstocks.  But I never do.  So the shoes rot in the basement.


However, those are issues for another day and another post.  Today, my son's room is clean.  And I can revel in the fact that I got it done.  I don't know how long it will last - although now that he's 7, he's responsible for keeping it clean, on threat of losing his allowance - but for now, I feel better about it.

3 comments:

  1. Isn't it amazing how much stuff they have? I too have been going through a major cleanse/purge of my house and it feels great and freeing. Jesse is even not holding onto so much stuff either. As I let go of my obsessions with stuff, so does he. Once again the parent leads the process :-)

    Krystal

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  2. Parallel lives strike again! This weekend I did the same thing to my son's room. Ours was a whole family, all weekend project. The room was both a mess, and there were lots of things he'd outgrown. So it was trashbags, a trip to Goodwill and a box to pass on to friends with younger kids. And best yet, a "new" desk, a father/son refurbishing project. I think everyone is pleased with the clean & organized space. A boy's gotta have space to be a boy!!

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  3. I am so relieved to see your 'before photos'...because I do not feel alone anymore! Yay! Other parents' have kids with rooms exactly the same as in my house, lol. I also go through the stages cleaning the boys rooms (which also can be 6 hours EACH)...they look great, then slowly the mess adds up again. But it is the same here - they love their clean rooms and immediately want to play in them. I need to think of some ways that their rooms actually STAY clean, rather than cycling from clean to not bad to disastrous and back again. Let me know how Daniel does with the allowance as leverage. :)

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